At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
