Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Randomize
