ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
