this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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