Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
