Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize