What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Randomize
