We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
