Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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