well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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