FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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