before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Randomize
