I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
false alarm. still invincible.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
