kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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