If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
