FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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