suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
