i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize