Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
