Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
