I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
