Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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