Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
