YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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