ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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