all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
