please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
