I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
