But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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