I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
