dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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