just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
He felt like a one man threesome
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
