How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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