i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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