he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Randomize