did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
