i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Randomize
