turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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