To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
