fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
