Having a random hookup so left but love u
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize
