if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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