it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Randomize
