singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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