Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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