I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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