Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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