I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
