And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
We're using joints as your birthday candles
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
