it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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