woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize