I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
